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Don’t be a turkey when looking for a mate

By Staff | Oct 26, 2011

Ahhh… November. Are you eating pumpkin pie and feeling like a turkey because you’re single? Well, there are a hundred ways to cook, stuff, bake, slow roast, dry rub, fry and barbecue a turkey – and your dating life over the holidays. Don’t overstuff yourself with two helpings of buttery sweet potatoes, green beans cooked with bacon, chocolate cake, cookies, seven-layer salad, and mashed potatoes just because you’re single.

Another thing you want to make sure of is that you don’t want become an overcooked, chewy, icky, dry turkey either. You want to make sure your turkey has: tender breast meat, moist legs and thighs, soft skin, and of course, a memorable taste.

Instead of feeling like a can of cranberry sauce plopped onto a saucer during the holidays, you can embrace your single turkeyness and become the juicy center of a delicious buffet. So how is a hot, young single turkey supposed to do that? Well, we’re gonna treat being single like getting ready for Thanksgiving Dinner, in three tasty steps.

Step 1: Find the right recipe.

Step 2: Put on your sexy apron.

Step 3: Go shopping and find the right bird (this is always fun!)

Step one: You want to make sure to write down a good quality recipe. If you don’t know the recipe, how do you expect to get a dish that tastes great? Really do your homework and see what kind of turkey you actually like. Do some digging through a stack of cookbooks and glossy recipe magazines if you need to get some ideas.

Does it matter to you if your bird is dressed right, or if she acts like a frozen bird in the deep freeze? How much do you want your turkey to weigh? Would you like your turkey to have nice tasty muscles? Do you want to spend a lot of time cooking this turkey? Or do you want it to heat up fast? If you are looking for a fine, juicy turkey, but you feel like lunch meat, there are some things you can do to get you up to speed.

Step 2: You want to prepare your turkey properly. You want to be Grade A before you can find another Grade A bird. To do that you’ve gotta treat your bird right: feed it good healthy food, get plenty of free range time, and relaxing in the nest. Before you go to play in the field, don’t forget to brush your beak and fluff up your feathers!

Step 3: This is not the time for brooding. It’s time to go shopping for a some strong healthy birds with great plumage. You can find different birds in so many places, but you might have to go outside of the pen to find what you are looking for. There might be birds in another field or maybe even in some other town. Or, you might run into a new bird you like if you go shopping in a new grocery store or even just change the times that you go to pick up the stuffing.

If you just keep hanging around the same old places for lunch you’ll probably keep on eating boring turkey sandwiches in the deli. Expand your horizons! Get online, go to singles parties, extend your social network and show off the juicy turkey that you really are.

Dina Z Colada is a dating coach, writer, artist and owner of DatingFusion101.com, an event planning company specializing in parties for singles. No luck on the dating scene? Call Dina for a free dating consultation at (304) 871-4653.